#ThisisNotTheEnd

I'm not long home from my Project Trust Debriefing course, a two-day shih-bang that's traditionally held on the Isle of Coll. If you haven't been following my blog, the Isle of Coll is the home sweet home of Project Trust, it's where I had my selection and my training. Debriefing is very important in any situation, it gives you a sense of closure. Closure is something that i've needed. It's difficult to look to the future when you're wishing you could turn back time.

I left Largs on Sunday, taking the train to Glasgow for my three hour train to Oban. I spent a night in a backpackers with the rest of the Project Trust group. We shared our very large debriefing with the volunteers from Malaysia and Hong Kong, who we hadn't seen since training over a year ago. It was so cool to see them and hear their really incredible stories that differed worlds apart from ours. The Malays were impressed with our South African dance moves, we were impressed with their traditional dress and fascinating lack of social skills (joke.)

Reunited with my RASTA SISTA

Dance moves to be proud of

Our night in the backpackers was great fun but a little too much fun for some, I won't mention names but you know who you are! The next morning was exhausting but we managed to wake up bright and early to haul our rucksacks to the harbour in time for the ferry. The ferry to Coll is about three hours long. I used that time wisely and finished my community report for Project Trust. Walking off the ferry brought on some serious de ja vu. The first time I ever stepped off that ferry, I never knew If I'd be coming back. It's been a long journey.

Arriving at the PT center was great fun. We all settled into our rooms and had a nice lunch. Sooner or later, it was time to get into the serious stuff. The whole day was spent reflecting on the past. We analyzed our years, took pride our achievements, realized how we had grown and discussed what we had gained.We spoke about our community reports, global citizenship and global issues that we had witnessed overseas, such as racism, religion, racial segregation and aids.

Each group chose a topic to focus on, ours was the issue of South Africa's Apartheid. Our main discussion went something like this;

Before arriving in South Africa, we only recognized the apartheid as part of South Africa's past. We never  expected to witness the mass effect that apartheid still holds over South Africa. Bars for specific races, superstores where only white people shop and racially segregated towns were few of the obvious  statements. Twenty years ago, black people wouldn't have shopped in that superstore because they weren't allowed to - by law. Apartheid ended a long time ago but it's still grasping onto South Africa. The issues aren't so obvious  in cities like Cape Town, where progress is fast and the past is a thing to be left behind you. It's in the small towns, here and there, where you notice the lingering stares. 

What we found most difficult to deal with was the racism. More specifically, racism from people our own age. Black, white, coloured, anyone, everyone. People our age were born into a democratic South Africa. They were born into an Apartheid-free South Africa. So where does the fear and hatred come from? I can only assume that it has been passed down through the generations that had to suffer the impact of apartheid. It's so frustrating. Falling in love with South Africa can break your heart.

Day Two - it was a day to put the past behind us and look to the future. How could our experience help us? How could Project Trust  continue to assist us? We discussed our hopes and dreams, plans and expectations. We learned how to make the most out of our year. We also discussed the nasty issue of our deportation. I'm confident that my appeal will be attended to; all I can do is wait and see. We also went to the beach.

Beautiful Coll Beach

This didn't work for me

It didn't really work for Katie either

Before our dinner, we had a short closing ceremony. The second John Fraser whipped out the poems, I knew I would be in tears. I was right, I was in tears. This is a poem by Robert Frost. It was also read to us on training, before our South African adventure even truly began. It holds a much stronger grasp on my heart now, after all that i've been through. The poem is called - The Road Not Taken.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

The other South Africans and I had a surprise for our fellow volunteers. We sang "Nkosi Sikeleli", the South African National Anthem. Nkosi Sikeleli Afrika translates to God Bless Africa. We were definitely very enthusiastic with our singing. After the anthem, Kieran burst into Shosholoza, where we followed his random lead and sang the best part of that. After our lovely roast chicken dinner and white wine, we split up to get ready for the CEILIDH! Having a ceilidh is another good old Project Trust tradition. Oh my, it was so exhausting. I danced every second dance and had a drink every second break. It was very hot and sweaty, very busy and even a little bit violent but it was all in good fun.

Partners

The Malaysians in traditional dress

South Africa 13/14 Girls

Partner Love

Ceilidh Fun

The Lads

The whole night was great. The whole course was great. My journey with Project Trust isn't over, it will never be over. As Project Trust said, #ThisisNotTheEnd. PT really like their hashtags. I've got to say though, my new favourite Project Trust Hashtag has to be #ThisisProjectBus. It was a statement made by one of the volunteers who insisted (as a joke) that our fundraising money was spent on pimping out the new PT buses. All Abroad For Africa, Asia and The Americas!

#OverandOut

Settling into the unsettled

Don't get me wrong, I'm doing alright. Life back home is just far from life in South Africa. I signed on with the notoriously ridiculous job center, hoping they would support me while I find work. So far, they have told me I can't go to my Project Trust Debriefing and won't be paid until I've been here for three months. I was born here, I've lived here my whole life! That's what you get for spending a year doing something worthwhile - a slap in the face.

Not to worry, I'm definitely going to my debriefing. It's a closure course back on the Isle of Coll, where it all began. Apparently, I can only go if I sign something to state i'll come home immediately if I'm offered a job. I've also got to search for jobs while I'm on Coll. That's fabulous considering there's no wifi.There isn't even a phone signal. Shh. As far as not paying me is concerned, if they don't, I can't afford to sign on every fortnight. It's a lose-lose situation. They then had the cheek to ask me what i'll do if I can't find a job. Er, DIE?

Other than that, it's okay. I spend my days wondering what to do then realize I have no money to do anything. I'll walk the dog, clean the flat and pace around for a few hours. Speaking of the flat, that's my new home. Mum had to move here while I was away. It's only got one bedroom but that's okay. South Africa toughened me up. I might be moving in with my brother soon, that will be alright so long as i'm not considered the house maid. 

The neighbours across the hall are encouraging me to lose my faith in humanity. I'm yet to actually see them face to face. I don't fancy doing so, for fear of what loss I'll see in their eyes. They scream, they shout. They leave their empty blue bags in the hallway. They fight, they stab, they spray blood across our door. They play techno on repeat until four in the morning. They beg that we call the police and then treat us like dirt. They stole our complimentary box of DVD's and replaced it with a box of cereal. They accuse our dog of being a devil and then break their own window in.

Other than the flats of death, Largs is a lovely town. The views are beautiful and the sun sets are incredible. There will be a massive viking festival on soon. With that comes good entertainment and good food.That will be something to keep me busy,  I can't wait. An unaware local thought my dreads meant I was a viking. Oh dear, I suppose it doesn't get more Scottish than that. 

As soon as I have some form of income, I can move on with my America plans. I'm still confident that i'll be out there by February. Note that I said "out there" and not "out of here". There will be a detailed post on that soon. I'm thinking of starting a new blog called something like Conversations with a Generation. I've overheard and heard so much bad word recently that should definitely be publicized.

A beautiful view of Arran and Millport from Largs

And a lovely view of Largs Town

TRAINING

16/07/13

Today was the day my wall of denial crumbled into a million pieces. I feel like a ticking time bomb - this is real. - this is a mere fraction of the emotionally driven letter I wrote to myself. Writing yourself a letter can be so beautiful, it's personal and a solid connection to so many memories. Our desk officer Dave will give us our letters in February, when he comes to visit us in South Africa. We will have been at our placements for almost 6 months. In this moment it feels extremely private, but I'm sure in seven months time i'll be happy to share it!

21/07/13

Inspiring, exciting, ridiculous, hilarious, educational & of course that bit terrifying.

Our training course was from 15th - 19th June. 36 South Africa volunteers, 2 Hong Kong volunteers and Malaysians boost that number to 62. There was so many volunteers that some had to sleep on the floor, or even better - outside in a tent! (ha ha) The majority of volunteers arrived in Oban on the 14th, ready for a night in backpackers. After having a tasty meal with everyone and meeting my lovely partners, we were all giddy and prepared for the week ahead. 

Niamh, Rachael, Anna and me. Partners for Durbansville!

Our ferry journey to Coll took around 3 hours. Time passed quickly with rough - diving over the table and shoving people out of the way kind of rough - games of spoons. I was so excited to be back on the island, it is incredibly beautiful and isolated.

Spoons - Definitely my favourite car game!

The beautiful Hebridean Center at night!

Laura with our new Project Trust hoody. Just outside the Center!

Beautiful and Misty Coll!

After a nostalgic ride in Project Trust's land rover to the Hebridean Center, we were straight into lessons. I won't go into everything in detail, surprises are more fun! Throughout the week everyone lives in the PT center. I was roomed with my partners - Rachael, Anna and Niamh. We also had the lovely and very Irish Nadine in our room, who unfortunately had to sleep on the floor! We were pleased to have running water in our dorm, other's were lucky to get a dribble. With so many volunteers brushing teeth and having showers at the same time, you won't be surprised to hear that we ran out of hot water and water altogether - multiple times! Everyone took this lightly - it adds to the experience. 

Our dorm room!

One of the most exciting things for me was meeting the country group - especially my partners! 

The South Africa Volunteers with our Desk Officer Dave to the Right!

We also got along great with the Malaysia and Hong Kong volunteers. It was sad to say goodbye knowing that we won't see them until Debriefing. Have a sweet time overseas guys! 

Now, for anyone that knows me from school, this will shock you. I TAUGHT A DRAMA CLASS! As part of our social care training, we had to plan and hold a "club" aimed at a specific age. I grouped with my partner Anna and together we held a very successful and very fun drama class. Everyone else doing social care had to pretend they were between 9-13 years old and participate in our class. It was so much fun. I really hope I get to start my own little group with the children at Durbansville. It was also incredibly fun joining in with the other clubs - art, spelling, dancing and oh dear - running. (thanks Fraser and Lewis) 

The social side to training was brilliant. From swimming in the sea (in the rain) to dancing our hearts out on the last night - you definitely have a great opportunity to bond with the group.

Rachael, me, Diarmid, Lewis, Anna and Dale during the Ceilidh!

Dancing away at the Ceilidh!

It wasn't all fun and giggles however, training is a very serious and intense course. Diseases, infections, sex, drugs, alcohol, child abuse, behavioral problems, bereavement, harassment, naivety, riots and violence were few of the serious sessions covered. The shock factor certainly settled in throughout the week. Although these sessions are terrifying, some of them are inevitable. We learned to look through them with a steady mind and a strong heart.

We were very lucky to spend Nelson Mandela Day at training. Two of our Volunteers Tom and Jess sang "Shosholoza". It was the most  beautiful version, i'm not the only one that got emotional! CLICK HERE to view Project Trusts article on Mandela Day.

Our Country Group supporing Mandela Day!

Me and Lewis were the last two standing in Oban. After our train to Glasgow and a short walk to the bus station, it was hard to say bye. Knowing that was the last step before standing in the airport ready for our flight was a little scary. Especially now that...I HAVE MY FLIGHT TICKETS.

Lewis in the Rank Room - where things get serious!

The most important thing is that I now feel prepared for South Africa. It has finally settled in that I leave in a mere 30 days. It hasn't quite settled in that I will be gone for a full year.

In time.

#ThisisProjectTrust

Jolly July

04/07/2013

Woah Woah Woah

OTHER THAN OH MY GOSH I'M SO EXCITED...I don't have much to say. As far as money-raising is concerned, it has been a quiet world. My weekend to Birmingham lessened (greatly) the amount of spending money that I had saved for South Africa. 

My only hope of more spending money lies in the fate of car boot sales and a summer job. Car Boot sales are simple to attend, but unfortunately rely on the weather. Of course, this is Scotland and that leaves them unpredictable and to be honest, a bit of a nuisance. Getting up at 7am to organize my boxes of bric-a-brac only for the heavens to open at the last minute can be very frustrating! As for a summer job, well, if only it were that simple! I will keep you posted. I have around £550 out of the preferred £1000 spending money. If you would like to help me out, feel free to contact me. It's not spending money for buying pretty things, it's living expenses! 

On a more positively exciting note...

I will depart from Heathrow Terminal 4 at 2.45pm on August 21st. HOW EXCITING?! I will arrive in South Africa on the 22nd August, where I will spend a couple of days in Johannesburg for a short briefing with the whole country group. From there, me and my partners will head to Cape Town.

I have already arranged my travel from Glasgow to London - you can call it organised or paranoid. I have been worried for some time now about how much it would cost me. Surprisingly, it was only £18 in total! £12 for a Megabus ride to London Victoria, and a further £6 for a National Express coach from Victoria to Terminal 4. I feel so lucky to have found such a bargain! The Megabus is a night bus, so I will be leaving Scotland on the 20th! 

On a even more positively exciting note...

I leave for training a week on Sunday! I am so excited about meeting my partners and learning more about my placement. Watch this space for my Training post - with photo's!